We all have gone through withdraws in our life, by choice or by force. Drugs, alcohols, coffee, smoking, you name it, we have heard is not fun. Well, mine is not as common per se. I am suffering of pregnancy addiction. Hi, my name is Afrodita and I’m addicted to pregnancy – at least my first one.

I don’t know what it was but me being pregnant with baby M was the best time of my life as an adult. Aside from the nausea and the excessive amount of tiredness in the first few weeks, there was nothing that made me feel like pressing the fast-forward or skip button, if existed, of my life.

To the contrary, I felt like I wanted a stop or pause mode instead. If this was the best I have ever been, why would it have to keep moving away from me?

Some of the wonders I can brag about:

• I felt the most confident woman I’ve ever been in my entire life, personally and professionally. I felt like I could conquered the world. Not once I felt worried for the birth of my baby. In fact, these circumstances seemed to me that were out of my control anyway and no matter how much I planned it. So, I felt at ease most of the time and found myself not worrying about the things that I could not control. I became the dream of my own personal and professional fantasy. There was no doors to stop me and there were no broken feelings.

• I felt gorgeous, sexy, beautiful. I felt a huge love for myself. I felt like mother earth was opening its arms to me and I was a Godess. There was a deeper cosmic connection with this world.

• In control. While I was a physical disaster by the end of the third trimester, my body was responding great during the whole ride. I barely felt pregnant. And, to add a cherry to this, I was mentally sharp as ever.

But, as I have heard, in any great affair there might be an end eventually. Mine left me high and dry, 9 months were not enough for a dream life. I’ve been feeling the withdraw slowly since I gave birth and did not know how to be good on my own again.

I guess like any other junkie, I should get my fix every now and then from good quality stuff. So, here you have it, without any shame to share what gets me through some days. At least when I go through a withdraw.

Even though it looks like I loved pregnancy, it was pregnancy that loved me more. 🙂

Linking up with Lovelinks #33